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GRID by Chris Castle |
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He sat in front of the mirror and stared. Brad. His name
was Brad Foster. As if on cue, the woman called the name out and he listened to
it, trying to adjust his response to the sound and inflection of each letter. A
final time, he looked back to the glass and saw what it showed him. An impostor,
responding to the name of a stranger. It was a riddle to make the world go
crazy. He drew one final deep breath in the darkness and then summoned up his
voice.
“Yes, Mom?”
How did it work?
It worked because of the thousands of men headed to war,
only to return senseless and damaged. Families broken apart not only by those
who did not come back but also by those who returned fractured and torn. The
newspapers did not report the aftermath of the war but only the surface pictures
of embraces and inter-locked fingers. None of the journalists told of the
nightmares or the drinking and the violence. No, this was a country that would
only celebrate success, no matter how fleeting. It was a war fought in snapshots
and images, not details and facts.
It was in such a newspaper that he hit upon the idea. Too
young to serve and too poor to enjoy life, he bummed from town to town, feeling
adrift as the waitresses who would mention sons lost overseas with glassy,
distant eyes. It was a local paper that offered up a spread of local boys, whose
initials read a.w.o.l. and not R.I.P. He wondered how much of that was the truth
and how much was good old flag-waving denial. He stared hard at each of the boys
and settled on the one who looked most like himself. In fact, after a good,
strong stare, it was almost uncanny how much they appeared alike. In that
moment, it was decided.
And what if it were a lie?
That was what he told himself as he stood in the post
office and claimed he had a delivery package for the poor son-of-a-bitch's
mother. He, who had never been lucky enough to have a family worth a damn, who
was kicked from one foster home to the next. The soldier’s surname was not lost
on him - mis-treated and tortured just as much as any enlisted guy at the hands of
the Hun, he bet. He was offering to be a lost son to a grieving mother: what was
the hurt, the real sin, in that?
He made his way up to the farm and saw the place itself
was as remote and as shaded as any spook house sketch. It sent a chill up his
spine and somehow, even as he walked forward, a word slipped into his mind-war
zone. It was almost enough to make him turn and forget the whole crazy notion
but his scuffed shoe caught in the dirt and that stopped him. That image of his
poor man’s shoe, the sole flapping like a thirsty dog, too broke to even have
coins for a cobbler. To hell with it, he thought, and turned back to the lonely,
doomed looking plot of land.
After a swift rap on the door, he stood back, trying to
appear suitably dazed without looking clownish and waited. There was the swift
snap of locks yielding and in a rush the door opened and a tall, slender woman
faced him. She was not as old as he’d imagined, nor as big. She looked something
like a background feature in a crowded painting, willowy yet somehow noticeable.
He looked at her and waited to see how she would respond.
“Mom?” he said after too many seconds had passed. He had
swallowed nettles on his walk up and his tongue was suitably swollen and
indistinct. The air around him seemed to grow wet, even though the day itself
was dry. A part of him screamed to turn round and leave, even as the gaunt woman
reached forward and drew him into a hug. At first he flinched but then allowed
himself to be taken by the woman. As she ushered him forward, into the house, he
noticed with some surprise how strong she felt and a sense of something, of
being engulfed and of being swallowed, came over him, even as he accepted her
power and let himself be dragged inside.
The house itself was a long, spiraling thing, all angles
and turns, at odds with the farm-like cottage he had seen at a distance. As she
led him to the kitchen table and sat him down, he sharply wondered about the man
of the house. As she set the tin kettle on the stove, he looked around for any
signs of a man, a photo or even a discarded overcoat but there seemed to be
nothing but clean surfaces and shiny walls and doors. It felt like a glass
house, preserved rather than lived in and too glacial to have people living in
it. He looked up and saw the woman looking at him, not smiling nor scared. In
fact, out of the two of them, she seemed more at ease with the latest twist of
fate to have befallen them both.
The kettle whistled and she poured tea, leaving his a
little distance from his fingers, as if she wanted to observe him. A dry heat
and prickle ran through him as he wondered if she was wise to his ruse.
Suddenly, everything felt like a trap; from the way he sipped his tea to the way
he lifted the cup. An acute paranoia ran through him that didn’t even subside
when she eventually smiled. If anything, the smile made the sense of dread
washing over him even stronger.
“I told you not to go,” she said. Her voice was soft but
not weak, as if she were reading a bible passage as a bedtime lullaby. It
carried a timbre, a force that made him listen, even though he had to stoop a
little to hear her words. It felt as if he had to cradle his ear to take in each
letter, but having done so, could not rid himself of them.
“I told you to stay,” she went on, shaking her head as if
chastising herself for having ever doubted her own belief. The pressure for him
to break the spell, to add something, anything, rose up in him like a fever.
“Trenches,” he mumbled. She looked him over, appraised him
and then set her tea cup down. Even these small actions filled him with a low
sense of panic, as if they were orchestrated and she had somehow mapped
everything out in advance of him coming. None of it made sense to him and he
wondered if the numbness of his nettle stung tongue was actually the weeds at
all but something greater and deeper inside of him.
“They never should have let you go over there,” she said.
“I am going to run you a bath and let you get some rest. You must be exhausted.”
Her hand glided over to him and brushed over his knuckles, patting his skin like
a breeze. A sweat broke over his forehead and he nodded thanks, keenly aware
that a bath would be a good and necessary escape at this point.
As he undressed, the steam climbed over the room. The bath
itself was a luxury-no more tin outhouses and second hand bath water, at
least-though his sense of unease would not leave him. He had expected to control
things when in fact, the total opposite had happened. Somehow, it had felt from
the start, as if she had been waiting for him. But what was it, really? She had
done nothing, acted in no odd fashion and yet everything about her unnerved him.
She was too calculating, he thought. Mothers, even the godless trolls he had
endured in his own childhood, had displayed some sort of warmth, or at least
response, to their own flesh and blood, even if it were hatred or tears. The
woman was too passive, too…brittle where emotions should have flared; he saw
only gestures and reactions. There was too little of something in her, something
vital. It was as he lowered himself into the tub that he realized what that
essence was: it was life.
As he soaked in the tub, so far the only true delight he
had experienced in the house so far, he made the decision to steal what he could
and go on his way in the morning. The plan had been absurd anyway and he
reasoned one of two things: it had either been a hopeless, hapless failure from
which he would learn from, or a perfect dry run for the next time, in another
town with a more warm and gullible set of folks. Either way, his pathway was now
set and knowing this, a certain amount of peace flooded into him, seeping into
his heart and relaxing him as much as the water. It was only as he allowed
himself a few precious moments of peace that he became aware of a strafing light
cutting across from the far door. He raised himself up and saw the source of the
light; a keyhole that had only just revealed itself. He pulled himself up, aware
that the woman had been watching until whatever in her was satisfied. His
stomach roiled as he reached for the nearest towel, cursing the fact he had set
aside clothes in the other man’s bedroom. If not for that, he would have dressed
and clamored out of the window there and then. Not caring for the pools of
overlapping water spilling onto the floor, he marched towards the door and the
new beam of light, ready to leave.
It was as he sat on the bed and stared at the mirror that
the woman called out the name. He responded but felt the jumble of his mouth
betray him. Something in him tilted and he found himself looking back at the
mirror at an odd angle. The reflection was no longer him but the Brad Foster of
the newspaper clipping. As he tried to straighten up, more fog enveloped him and
the mirror image split in two, revealing the real Brad Foster at his shoulder.
The tea, he thought helplessly, it was in the tea. He put a hand up to stop
himself from tumbling onto the floor but it did him little good. In the mirror
the phantom Foster still stood over him and it looked for a moment as if the two
of them were shaking hands, perhaps being formally introduced for the first
time. Then, in the next moment, the darkness fell.
He came round in a cellar, the chill telling him that it
was both night and outside. Above him, the woman stood, looking down at him. Her
eyes were almost glowing, the brown unnatural in their power. Even as she was
wrapped in fury, he couldn’t help but think how it was the first time she had
seemed real to him.
“I told him not to go,” she said, her voice trembling now.
All the façade of the kitchen table act was stripped away now, leaving only
rage. “All the things he said, all those accusations he spouted. That was all he
left behind for me, his own mother.”
“I-” he tried to speak but his mouth was still too gummy,
his eyes too rheumy. He felt closeted in foul smelling honey, mummified in some
sort of clogging paper.
“All those terrible things he said and then he came back.
Shell shocked, struck dumb, left with all the sense of a barn yard animal…and
still I wasn’t good enough for him!” Her voice was a long, high-pitched shriek
now, the sound of animals dying.
“I tried and I tried and then after it ended, the very
next week, you turn up with this…charade, this set of pathetic parlor tricks.
God has a wicked sense of humor, that indeed he does.” She shook her head,
sated after her outburst and then drew her head down to the bars, so her nose
almost poked through to his side of the cell.
“I won’t have to worry about people coming looking for you
now, will I?” Her voice was a whisper now but still somehow managed to maintain
its venomous spite.
“I am…” he managed to croak, his foggy mind whirring into
overdrive and fighting the dust to try and salvage something from all of this.
Before he could finish, she rolled over, onto her back and tugged down her
dress. A small perfect grid on her right shoulder blade appeared. It was a grey
cube with black dots, almost something like a tiny board.
“A birthmark,” came her voice from seemingly far away.
“You’ll see,” she went on, hauling herself up and adjusting the dress to once
more cover herself. In a moment he understood why she had been spying on him for
and what she noted he did not have.
“I am…” he managed to blurt out, but she was already
drawing herself up to her feet.
“We’ll see if you are, given time, if you can be a special
son to me,” she said, her hard, cracked eyes briefly changing into something
darker and hungrier. “In time,” she said once more and then disappeared, leaving
only the bars to the cellar, the jail, whatever it was, for him to see.
He collapsed onto the floor and moaned to himself, as he
took the time to look at his surroundings. The floor was bare, the walls empty.
All that was left to him was a shadowed lump in the far corner of the room. A
gasp came from him, one that grew into something like a whimper. He crawled over
to the darkened mess and kept blubbering, knowing in an instant what it was but
having to see it for sure, if only to confirm his own, terrible place in the
world. He drew himself up and sure enough a lifeless face reflected back at him.
Upon touch, it lolled slightly, swinging around enough to reveal a small grid
like birthmark on its dead skin back, introducing the real Foster son to him.
Upon that discovery, the keening in his throat became a full pitched howl.
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Chris Castle is an English teacher in Greece. He has been published
over 300 times and has been featured in various end of year and best of
anthologies. He is currently writing a novel. His influences include Stephen
King and Ray Carver. He can be reached for feedback at
chriscastle76@hotmail.com. Chris’s story, Grid, appears in the
January 2013 issue of HelloHorror.
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